By Joe Byerly
We build the future in our head with such vivid imagery. We can taste the salt on the rim of an ice-cold margarita. We can walk through every moment of the romantic date—every reaction, the way candlelight hits our partner’s eyes. We can smell the leather of the chair in the corner office with our name on the door.
The ultimate vacation falls short. The date night lands flat. The dream job wasn’t that great.
Future becomes the present and imagination becomes reality.
It’s like the moment in The Great Gatsby when Gatsby is jolted into the reality of Daisy, one that could never compete with the idealized image he created of her over the years in his imagination:
“Daisy tumbled short of his dreams—not through her own fault, but because of the colossal vitality of his illusion. It has gone beyond her, beyond everything. He had thrown himself into it with a creative passion, adding to it all the time, decking it out with every bright feather that drifted his way. No amount of fire or freshness can challenge what a man will store up in his ghostly heart.”
We all have a Daisy— an ephemeral future “what if”—or several of them. We store up images in our hearts that no amount of fire or freshness can challenge. In some ways, we are all like the fated Gatsby.
When we imagine the future, we edit out the friction of life and fill the gaps with fantasy, certainty, and wishful thinking.
Our reality can never compete with our imagination.
Something I’m learning: it’s better to have grace for the present. To accept it instead of resenting it for not matching the version we rehearsed in our minds. To appreciate fleeting moments for what they are—not what we dreamed them to be.
Otherwise, we may spend our lives chasing Daisies, never fully living in the present we once imagined.
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Joe Byerly is a retired U.S. Army Lieutenant Colonel with 20 years of service, including tours in Iraq and Afghanistan, and command of a cavalry squadron in Europe. He earned numerous prestigious awards, including multiple Legion of Merits, Bronze Stars, the Purple Heart, and General Douglas MacArthur Leadership Award. In 2013, Joe founded From the Green Notebook.
A passionate advocate for self-knowledge through reading and reflection, he authored The Leader’s 90-Day Notebook and co-authored My Green Notebook: “Know Thyself” Before Changing Jobs, a resource for leaders seeking greater self-awareness. If this post resonated with you or sparked any questions, feel free to reach out to him at Joe@fromthegreennotebook.com.
