By Kevin Buettner
Why are you chasing what you’re chasing, Senior Military Member? Yes you, the E-8, the E-9, the CW-4, the O-5, the O-6. I see your sacrifice, your late hours, your dedication–putting it all on the line. But have you ever stopped, picked your head up, and truly given thought to WHY you’re chasing what you’re chasing? Over my last three years in uniform, I talked to dozens of hard-charging Army Colonels about this very topic. What I found is that many have no idea “why.” Finding the answer is worth unpacking.
Here’s the reality: once you get to 20 years of military service (plus or minus), every assignment you take gets harder. And not a little more difficult–it goes from 0 to 60 in a snap. The complexity of your personal life multiplies quickly. Moving when your kids are in elementary school is doable, but transplanting teenagers is complicated, if not heart-wrenching. This same season of life often also brings the responsibility to care for aging parents. You’re getting older, and continued service gets more difficult physically, mentally, and emotionally. But you still feel this urge to stay in the fight, to continue advancing your career. And honestly, good for you. The military needs the best leaders possible at the helm. No argument there.
What I have found is that as the sacrifices of service grow more significant, many service members increasingly avoid rationalizing their career goals. In the very season when reasoning should be sharpest because the stakes are higher, it seems many find creative ways to ignore it. The years that your teenage child needs you most are the same years that you are working 0600-2000 in the halls of the Pentagon to be competitive for that next board. This chase goes deep into military culture and the ethos of service, and it’s a topic that should be written and talked about more. Here are four of the more common uncomfortable reasons why some continue to chase. Maybe one or more will resonate with you. At the very least, these reflections from my own time in service will perhaps spur some thoughts as you ponder your own career and mentor others along in theirs.
We Lost Sight of Our Value
After 20+ years of doing this military career thing, many of us have tied our self-worth to career advancement. Plain and simple: if we do not continue in the career chase, we are unsure what value we bring. Service, and advancement in service, is not what we DO; it is who we ARE. And in the “profession of arms,” that is often a necessary detachment. Service demands so much sacrifice. It’s a calling, not a job. But along our journey we can lose sight of the path back to balance. We logically know and, when asked, will parrot back our value as a spouse, parent, family, and friend. But that’s not what we feel, is it? We feel that our value comes from that next board or promotion. You struggle to admit it, but you don’t really want that command, you don’t want to PCS anymore, but without the validation that those things bring, who are you?
We Bought the Company Line
We have been hard-wired, programmed to chase. I had a boss once state, “If someone is keeping score, I want to win.” That was his approach. It didn’t matter whether the contest mattered. It didn’t matter if he wanted the prize at the end, if there even was one. Many senior military members have this same Pavlovian response. We chase because we have chased for 20 years, because we’ve been told to chase, because we’re surrounded by others that chase. We know no other way. Many of those in the chase don’t really want the prize, because honestly, service at the highest levels is not a personal or professional match for most. Here’s some inside baseball: service at the highest levels is not fun. Rewarding? Yes. Impactful? Of course. It entails tremendous responsibility with sacrifice beyond what those on the outside will ever know. Those that have worked closely with General Officers have seen it play out. Yet many service members can’t help but chase, putting their personal health and families on the line, betting it all on the next roll of the career dice–not because they want the prize but because they are addicted to the roll.
We Stopped Thinking Along the Way
And this is really it, isn’t it? Somewhere along the way we stopped being deliberate pilots of our own path. Oh, we fool ourselves that we are strategic in our career planning. We have PowerPoint career maps to prove it. But under the surface, it’s just a slight variation of the same path, chasing the same prize as everyone else. Many of us are like kids on the airplane carnival ride turning the steering wheel as if we’re controlling things. In actuality we are just spinning in the same circles as everyone else. Early in our careers this adoption of the party line served as a survival tactic, because many leaders judge subordinates by how well they echo the “chase, chase, chase” mantra. But many don’t grow out of this. Instead, as they advance they double down. Many become that same judgmental leader, evaluating the next generation by whether or not they also chase. And so it goes.
We Fear the Alternative
To stop chasing is to face the question, “What will I do now?” We are afraid. It’s okay to say it out loud. We don’t often enjoy addressing fear in this profession, but it’s real and we need to call it what it is. Imagine trying to jump into a job market and the very foreign land of business. It’s terrifying. Resumes? No idea. LinkedIn? Social media is an OPSEC threat. Job interviews? Nope. Business attire? You’re speaking Greek to me. We don’t know those waters, let alone how to navigate them. So instead many seniors put their head in the sand, keep themselves distracted by pursuing the next advancement whether or not they are competitive for it, and ignore reality as if they can serve forever. Spoiler alert: service ends for us all. You need not fear this. Trust and believe that there are more programs and support organizations out there to assist you on this journey than you could ever leverage.
Listen, there is nothing wrong with wanting to be a senior leader in your branch of service. Nothing at all. Maybe you have a passion and gifting for steering larger and larger organizations. Maybe you have a vision for your branch or functional area that will increase readiness and lethality and directly contribute to national defense. As a service and as a nation, we need that. Maybe that next promotion is financially what you need to support your long-term goals. All of that is great. If you just want to wear an eagle on your chest because you like birds, that works too. There is no WRONG answer here–as long as it’s YOUR answer.
What is NOT great is adopting someone else’s answer because you don’t do any critical thinking of your own. Many senior military members are on autopilot, being pulled along by the very real and very strong cultural undercurrents of the Army, Navy, Air Force, or Marine Corps. Do you know what you want? Truly? Can you rationally explain why you want it? I’m not telling you to drop paperwork; I’m encouraging you to take back control of your journey. The stakes are too high to float along here–marriages, relationships, mental health, quality of life, and peace for you and for your family are in the balance.
Want to be a 2-star? More power to you. Want to be a Brigade Command Sergeant Major? Go crush it. But are you chasing it just because? Did you fall into one of the four categories above? Hey, that’s great too. At least now you know. The chase is a powerful spell. You’re not alone. It’s not a conspiracy, it’s not deliberate. It is a natural outgrowth of the immense personal sacrifice required to commit your career and very life to the profession of arms. If you’re under this enchantment, I hope that this discussion snaps you out of it. Whether you want to pursue that promotion, serve out more years at your current rank, or go an entirely different direction, at least it will be because you’re thinking clearly.
Kevin Buettner retired from the U.S. Army in February of 2023. He served as a Military Intelligence officer for 23 years and currently works within U.S. Army Intelligence and Security Command. His last assignment in uniform was as the Assignment and HR Manager for MI Colonels. He is a 1999 graduate from West Point and holds a Master’s Degree in Physics from University of Wisconsin.
