By Joe Byerly
“I’ll try to find some time.”
“I need more time.”
“There’s not enough time in the day.”
These phrases used to roll off my tongue without a second thought. My relationship with time was…contentious.
My calendar dictated my life.
When I tried to find time, it was elusive. When I needed more of it, the clock was already at zero. Days felt like they were speeding up.
Weeks would go by without that date night.
Months, and I still hadn’t called that friend.
Years, and I still hadn’t started the project I kept saying I would.
It wasn’t until I began to view time differently that things changed. Time, I realized, is greedy. Sneaky. Fast.
It hides behind excuses. Behind packed schedules. Behind “just one more reel” on Instagram.
Time keeps taking and ticking—slipping away—not because we suck as humans, spouses, parents, or friends, but because that’s what time does.
If I wanted to invest in myself, the things I wanted to accomplish, or in the relationships that mattered most, time wasn’t going to hand those moments over.
I would have to fight for them.
I had to stop waiting on time, and start making it. I had to become a creator of time.
Despite 70-hour work weeks and the stress of military life, we made time to travel. We made time to have fun. I made time to read, write, and podcast.
I didn’t discover secret hours hiding in the couch cushions. I changed my relationship with time and took agency over it.
I learned to say no.
I learned to prioritize what mattered.
And most importantly, I began to see time as something I could have more control over. I can decide what I want to do with my time. I have agency.
As Seth Godin puts it: “You don’t need more time. You simply need to decide.”
So now, I know that if something is important to me, I’m going to make time for it. Time keeps moving regardless of how I feel about it, and once it’s gone, we can’t get it back. That means saying no to things that are misaligned with my priorities. It means evaluating opportunities against what matters most. Most importantly, it means being intentional with how I spend my time because I’ve learned that time isn’t something that happens to me. It’s something I create.
Joe Byerly is a retired U.S. Army Lieutenant Colonel with 20 years of service, including tours in Iraq and Afghanistan, and command of a cavalry squadron in Europe. He earned numerous prestigious awards, including multiple Legion of Merits, Bronze Stars, the Purple Heart, and General Douglas MacArthur Leadership Award. In 2013, Joe founded From the Green Notebook.
A passionate advocate for self-knowledge through reading and reflection, he authored The Leader’s 90-Day Notebook and co-authored My Green Notebook: “Know Thyself” Before Changing Jobs, a resource for leaders seeking greater self-awareness. If this post resonated with you or sparked any questions, feel free to reach out to him at Joe@fromthegreennotebook.com.
