by Cindy M. Lopez
As you senior Cadets approach Commissioning, I hope that you are all as excited as I am for you. As a Non-Commissioned Officer, I do have a few requests from you.
When I first pinned the rank of Sergeant (SGT), I had only been in the Army for a little over 2 years. My First Sergeant (1SG) said to me, “You are now a Junior Non-Commissioned Officer. Some of your Soldiers were once your battle buddies, but now you are their NCO and leader. Do not get complacent with them. Allow them to help you help them succeed. It is their choice; you are just here to help and mentor them in whichever route they take.”
Shortly afterwards, I was forced to apply my First Sergeant’s wisdom with my former friend and now subordinate, Specialist Snuffy.
SPC Snuffy and I went through Advanced Individual Training together as young Privates. I was on my A-game, working outside of my rank to progress. I was ambitious and focused. SPC Snuffy’s focus was elsewhere. When I got promoted to SGT, she started acting as if my authority did not apply to her since we had known each other from the beginning. She would disobey my orders, she would not show up to our weekly huddles, she would not participate in required physical training. She became what others call my “troubled child.” I did not know how to handle it without harming our friendship.
Then, one day, my 1SG watched her subvert my authority in front of him, including her deliberately calling me by my first name to undermine my seniority. My 1SG pulled me aside and said “SGT Lopez, I know that you have the knowledge to fix that insubordination. Why didn’t you?” I did not know how to respond, I remained quiet. He said, “Go fix it, and that’s an order!”
I went to my car; I pulled out my laptop and typed up a negative counseling for disrespecting a Non-Commissioned Officer. I asked SPC Snuffy to meet me at the office. When she walked in, she said “What’s up, Cindy?” I responded “SPC Snuffy, at this moment we will begin to conduct your counseling for your insubordination.” I remember she chuckled, as I was reading the counseling. She continued to mumble words to the effect of “this is crazy, people get promoted and don’t know how to act, I thought we were friends.” SPC Snuffy did not change her negative behavior, and I documented everything from that day forward. What was most interesting to me was that it seemed she only behaved this way towards me due to our friendship.
By the third negative counseling, failing to complete the plan of action I counseled her but this time it was to inform her that I was recommending her for a Uniform Code of Military Justice (UCMJ) due to the continuation of her negative behavior. My job as her NCO was to conduct the proper counseling, ensure she understood the plan of action, close the counseling and re-open a new one for failing to follow the plan of action. SPC Snuffy was demoted from the rank of Specialist to the rank of Private. She blamed me for her demotion.
I remember feeling ashamed. But, I sat down with my 1SG shortly after this happened and he said “you held her to the standard; you kept her accountable for her actions. You did not do this to her, you will continue to experience uncomfortable situations like this one, throughout your military career. Buckle up, sar’nt.”
I walked out of that office with my entire perspective changed. I no longer walk around wanting to be liked, I walk around holding others to standard regardless of their rank and/or position. That experience and my First Sergeant’s words molded me into the NCO that I am today. I took those words and still live by them.
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I share this story not to scare you as a new leader, but to prepare you. You are about to embark on a new journey.
Your “10-meter target” will be the care and development of Junior Enlisted Soldiers. You will be in charge of Soldiers that come from backgrounds that you never thought even existed: Soldiers that were given an ultimatum to pick between jail time or to serve the nation, Soldiers that will look you in the eye and tell you that they don’t respect you because of your age, gender, race, etc. Soldiers that will try to test the waters to see how lenient or strict you will be as their new Platoon Leader. I have personally led Soldiers with all those backgrounds and more. But don’t worry, because you have the proper tools to manage every situation that may arise.
Those tools are the standards that apply to every service member, written in black and white through Army regulations, policies, team manuals, etc. When a Soldier fails to do their duties, conduct themselves in an unprofessional manner, lacks military customs and courtesies, fails their fitness test, does not care about their physical appearance – you, as a Commissioned Officer, must ensure that your Non-Commissioned Officer is holding them to the standard. You must hold your NCOs to the standard, and, sometimes, will be the one who has to correct NCOs who fail to meet it!
At the end of the day, your first mission will always be to support and defend the Constitution of the United States, and your second mission is to become the best leader to Soldiers you can be. Regardless of their background, behavior, attitude, or their skills as a Soldier – it is your responsibility to lead them.
As you graduate and become one of the greatest leaders our Army can have, I leave you with three roles you must ALWAYS remember to embody:
1. Leader: Soldier care is by far the most important element of your leadership responsibilities. Caring for your Soldiers, NCOs, and fellow Officers will help their mental health, will provide them peace and clarity, and will help achieve the overall success of the mission.
2. Learner: be an adaptive lifelong learner. A good leader is not created overnight. Remain humble and always willing to learn regardless of your rank. You might know things that others have never even heard of – but they might also know things that you would have never thought about. You will be placed on many different assignments, and will have to conduct uncomfortable conversations with people that have more experience in the military than you. I encourage you to remember, “SSG Lopez told me to adapt, I knew these uncomfortable situations would arise, and I have the tools to deal with them.”
3. Role Model: never forget where you came from: the hard work, long days, never-ending hours that you had to put in to get you where you are today. You and your Soldiers have unique strengths because of your background, struggles, and the fights you have endured. Model the best of your strengths, and recognize the unique strengths of the Soldiers you get to lead.
Sir/Ma’am, I say all of this to prepare you to take over your future responsibilities. Never forget that you are in charge, and when in charge, BE in charge. You are going to embark on one of the most rewarding jobs this life has to offer. You will be leading, guiding, motivating, educating, mentoring, and leading Soldiers from all over the world. You will not find this anywhere else, except right where you are now. So, in the words of my old First Sergeant, “buckle up” and do the right thing. Remember to stay true to yourself and do right by others. When life does get hard; take a knee, drink some water, count to ten and carry on, Sir/Ma’am.
Staff Sergeant Cindy M. Lopez serves as a 92G (Culinary Non-commissioned Officer) and is currently assigned to the United States Military Academy at West Point as the Honor NCO. SSG Lopez is on orders to attend the United States Army Drill Sergeant School during the summer of 2024.
